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August 9, 2003

FIGHT

Well I'm back from Chester - not a great deal to report really, except that I am now far more assertive, I can sell things and I am a budding negotiator.

However, because Mark R, Alex M and Tony L missed me so much, we all went into Watford last night for a few beers. All in all we had a good night, but it was when we were on the way home that we began to wonder if there was any justice in this world.

Whilst talking to a couple of Aussie girls in the street and mimicking them badly, a fight broke out just up the road. I saw some skin-headed animal kicking a guy in the head whilst the victim was laying motionless on the ground, then laughing and strutting away with his mates like he was really cool.

He was in a bad way. Within a minute there were several people around the victim, but all were panicking and not helping at all. Using my newly discovered assertiveness, I then called an ambulance and trotted up the road to find the police, whilst Mark knelt down beside the victim, removed the victim's tongue from his throat and thus saved his life. "Ugh, you've got blood on you" came the cry from one a female passer-by, "look, just get everybody away and give him some space" Mark replied, "why?" came the response. I could see Mark boiling over at such a stupid question, but luckily for all, the ambulance then appeared and treated the victim.

Meanwhile, I gave my witness details to the police who said that they "might need to contact me if he dies or something" and we eventually headed home, Mark with blood on his trousers and all feeling utterly p*ssed off that a good night had to end with some moronic hooligan trying to prove how tough he is.

SO, this is a message to all you sad w*nkers out there who think beating somebody to the point of death is big and clever. YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A BUNCH OF PEA-BRAINED IGNORAMUSES WITH THE GENERAL INTELLIGENCE OF A BOILED POTATO. YOUR SAD FAKE NECKLESSES, CHEAP WHITE TRAINERS AND POINTLESS TATTOOS AND EAR-RINGS ARE ALL PATHETIC FASHION ACCESSORIES THAT SIMPLY ADD TO YOUR OIKISH IMAGE. YOUR BEHAVIOUR IS ATROCIOUS, YOUR LANGUAGE IS FOUL AND YOUR ATTITUDE TOWARDS OTHERS IS NEFARIOUS (oops, forgot you are thick as pig-sh*t - I mean AWFUL). GET A LIFE YOU PITIFUL INDIVIDUALS. YOU ARE THE LOWEST OF THE LOW, DO US ALL A FAVOUR AND CRASH YOUR DREADFUL FAT-EXHAUSTED CARS INTO BRICK WALLS AT HIGH SPEED. YOU ARE A WASTE OF SPACE AND AIR.

Posted by jonola14 at August 9, 2003 8:46 AM

Posted by: shunta at August 9, 2003 12:38 PM

Posted by: Wibbler at August 10, 2003 7:54 PM