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May 11, 2003

SPLENDID

Now that I have taken delivery of my new computer, I am once more able to tell you all (both of you) about my drunken antics. Last night was a night out in Watford with Mark R and his old university friend Jason.

To start the evening off, Mark and I decided that we would put my half yard glass to proper use, so Mark volunteered first, in went the Boddingtons and down went the drink - 26.6 seconds. My turn. I tucked the tea towel into my shirt so as to avoid drippage onto my clothes, refilled the glass and downed it - 18.8 seconds - and so the half yard competition was born.

Several Stellas, Boddingtons and Carlings later, we stumbled out the door and headed for town, the alcohol beginning to have the desired effect. We wandered into the first bar, bought our drinks and sat down. After noting the fist marks in the damaged walls, being offered drugs by a very camp man in a pullover and ogling the women as they wandered past in the direction of the ladies, we very quickly upped and left.

As the evening progressed, we found ourselves in Watford's Chicago's Bar - my personal favourite location for general alcoholism and tomfoolery. The very greatest anthems from the past few decades blared out the speakers, people danced wildly on the floor and whilst Mark was 'liaising' with a 47 year old, Jason and I set about trying to get even more drunk.

Mark was then accused of being "very gay" by a couple of women who were astonished to find out that he was straight, and who gave me extremely funny looks when I announced that I lived with him.

Anyway, the bouncer so eloquently informed us that the night had ended when he told us to "f*ck off home", much to our amusement, so we kebabed up and staggered out. A kebab wasn't enough, though, so we turned up at the Tesco service station and demanded that the attendant feed us chocolate before finally departing. We left and decided that it would be a good idea to run over a car, I went first and set the alarm off so we sprinted for home, chocolate wrappers flapping in our wake.

So I woke up at 7am still fully clothed and sitting bolt upright on the lounge sofa, went to bed for two hours and here I am.

Good to be back.

Posted by jonola14 at May 11, 2003 9:36 AM

Posted by: Wibbler at May 11, 2003 2:34 PM

Posted by: Jac at May 11, 2003 4:10 PM