SLEEP TELEPHONING
May 24th, 2003 Posted in Uncategorized“Who the hell’s sending me a message at this time of night” I said to myself as the bleep bleeping of my mobile indicated somebody had sent me a text and I had to get out of my nice warm bed to get it. ‘Eurotrash is on’ - thanks Simon S. “Frankly I don’t really care” I grumpily said to myself, irritated that I had got out of bed for such a meaningless piece of info. “Best put it on silent and vibrate in case he sends another” I muttered, and placed the phone on my bedside table.
-BRRRRRRRRRRRRR BRRRRRRRRRRRRR-
“uuuuuh…. er…..hello?”
“HELLO MATE, IT’S MY BIRTHDAY”
“Happy birthday Simon H”
“Thanks mate - I’ve been to the pub and had a few beers, as you do, and now I’m on my way home. It’s errr, half past midnight and that means that IT’S MY BIRTHDAY so I thought I’d give you a ring to let you know and you can wish me HAPPY BIRTHDAY mate.”
- silence -
“so anyway, IT’S MY BIRTHDAY and there’s going to be lots of people around this weekend to celebrate it with me and I’ve got the rest of the week off, which is cool, and I intend to do absolutely nothing because IT’S MY BIRTHDAY mate!”
- silence -
“Mate?”
- silence -
- click -
8.30 the following morning
- DA NA NAAAAAAA - DA NA NAAAAAAA - DA NA NA…
“Hello?”
“Hello mate, it’s Simon H.”
“Oh hello mate, happy birthday”
“Thanks mate, finally reached the grand old age of 24.”
“Joined the rest of us then - did you do anything last night?”
“ummm, yeah, I went out and had a few beers, I told you last night, remember?”
“no?”
“when I spoke to you last night”
“what, did you?”
“yes, about half midnight, I phoned everyone in my phone book to let them know it’s my birthday.”
“don’t remember that, what did I say?”
“not a lot”
“oh. How odd.”
And so it continued. We eventually concluded that I had answered my mobile (which was on vibrate so God knows how it woke me) and sleep-talked to Simon. Moral of the story - don’t let Simon S watch Eurotrash.
